Hi Scarlet, No smiley faces here either, I'm looking this morning a what you just said Scarlet, " I don't make any change it won't be the end of the world". You all most got it!! but for me it was the end of the world. It's CHANGE, I wish someone told me this 30 years ago. You don't have to go down that road i went..
The key is change, Start a program of recovery and AA is one option, but there are others, to get started you need a open mind. For me I was not able to solve this problem myself, I had to have some kind of recovery program!!!!.
Recovery is a lot of hard work but its so worth it Scarlet.. This is all the genuine help I can give you and I hope you find your path in sobriety..
Best Wishes.