Good to hear from you wisedeb,
I think everyone wonders how you are doing so thank you for letting me know. It sounds like you are doing well and learning to manage what you need to right now.
I like the dependency on your HP and the role model of your grandfather. You many have enough on your plate before thinking about the future. It will take care of you if you take care of you.
I think many wonder about having another relationship. Everyone's answer will be different as our lives should be. I tend to think that if you want one it will come and if you are fine without one - you can keep things that way. At anytime you are allowed to change your direction and wants and needs so don't feel you have to be locked into any decisions.