Originally Posted by
mishaco1 
So after Al Anon last night I made a promise I would not respond to any of his texts. As soon as I got home, like clockwork, here the texts come....
I have not responded and I promised myself I would not. I am setting the goal of not responding to anything today and then I plan to set the goal the same for tomorrow and hopefully I will get to the point where I can set goals like "I won't respond for a week..." .
Don't respond. The first few days are the hardest. Then suddenly, something clicks, and the thought of responding makes you sick--and you can't bear the thought of responding. It's like smoking, the first 4 days are horrible. The next week is hard, and then it slowly gets better...and suddenly you notice, my god, life can be GOOD! I can breathe, everything smells so good! With no contact, you slowly realize sanity is coming back, you have more time, life is more productive...you lie in bed drifting off and feel a gurgle in your stomache and it's not hunger. It's happiness. :day6
Come here if you feel the need to respond. Respond to us. His texts are hilarious.
"Can you bring me guitar hero because I am bored" Poor wittle boo-boo, him is bored. "You are ignoring me now?". Give a star to Sherlock Holmes!
"Grow up, seriously?" This is said by a full grown man without a job, clinging to his bottle, supported by mommy and daddy, seldom coherently, in need of his Guitar Hero? LOLOLOLOL :rotfxko
"I won't feed into your game. Sorry.", Wow, is that projection or what?
"My phone is going off again" (this one irritates me because I NEVER just harass him but he somehow convinces himself it is all me - I won't let go). Projection again; he's the one who doesn't want to let go. Your A isn't the only one who is convinced he's too good a deal to pass up. My XAH was convinced I was following him around even as he was violating the restraining order by pretending he needed to take his daughter to the bus stop (the only one of six in the neighborhood that violated the restraining order--oh, and his daughter wasn't even supposed to be going to that school, she was living out of district. Oh, and what's more, him leaving work every afternoon at 2 pm to pick her up from a bus stop she shouldn't have been at had quite a bit to do with him loosing his job). This man was absolutely convinced that I was desperate to get him back, or catch a glimpse of him or something, that I was stalking him, driving around the neighborhood looking for him (I knew where he was--at the bar, near my house, far from his house). Yeah, because he's so hot and desirable and so much fun to be with and such a great catch---
NOT!
Originally Posted by
mishaco1 Finally they stopped about 10 pm or so when I did not respond but then they started again about 1 am: "I'm having a major panic attack.", "I really need to talk to you", "I need to breathe. Stay calm", "you awake" - then 3 phone calls and then one last message that says "I really need to talk to you and now you want to ignore me. I need comfort. Nice". Then it stopped. I woke up to one saying: "Life plain sucks"..
Tell me, did you have a panic attack while he was choking you? Or while you were grovelling under the bed for safety? When his hands were pressed against your windpipe, did the thought, "I need to breathe" cross your mind?
It was my experience that living with an alcoholic sucked. Life is good. Addiction sucks bad.