Hello,
If you are scared for you anonimity, you can definately find support right here.
I was also wondering, is talking about it to you father and/or older brother about this an option? It seem like they've got a lot of (admirable) experience and can maybe figure the alcohol part out together with you and your other resources? If you have a good relationship with them, might do you a world of good to open up to them. Just a suggestion.
But I think you are doing great things, give yourself time to heal.
Ps: being from europe, I didn't get the word mil...what does that mean?