Funny Feeling
Hello all!
I have been very happy since I made the decision to stop drinking and apply my self to the program and 12 steps. It just feels as if I have a promising future ahead without drinking and the depression it has caused me.
I get nervous about the changes I will go through without drinking but I fall back into the: its only for today mentality and it gets better.
Any way, I have been to 3 AA meetings only so far, but they have caused quite a good impression on me, I actually had a dream of me being in a meeting and gave me confort. Surprisingly, I was in a school meeting today, and I started getting really nervous. There were people around I did not knew and started thinking is any one here attending one of my meetings? Do they know I am an alcoholic? What if subconciously I start my contributions by My name is... and I am an alcoholic! It was scary for a minute or so and I felt really anxious. The topic of the meeting was about a get together for the school finishing the academic year with drinking being part of it so I was also thinking I should avoid that...I am not sure if that placed me in a mental spot where I flashed back to a meeting.
I have no idea what happened but I am afraid this will repeat it self in subsequent meetings outside of AA.
HAs any one experienced this?