hey Steve
well it's both good and bad to see you back here...
I know the pull of the party is strong - everybody wants to belong...and it's very seductive the idea of just cutting loose and letting go.
But we're just not like everyone else man - we can't just take it or leave it like our friends seem to do. It owns us.
You have to work out what you want more PS - to make the changes you know deep down you'll have to, or to live your life exactly as it is - and take the consequences.
I don't think you can do both - god knows I tried - but I lost 20 years of my life trying.
D