His reaction to detachment....
So I think I've gotten pretty good at the detachment thing...I have kind of let alot of anger go, and feel much more a t peace than in a very long time. I am able to worry about me and the kids, and not feel an obligation to him in the same way as before, recognizing him as repsonsible for his own action, his job, his words, his behaviors etc. Needless to say it has left a bit of a "silence"' between us - as our communication between each other in rarely genuine or sincere. His only type of communitcation is when he becomes angry or when making joke....we can NEVER have a serious conversation about feelings etc. SO....here is my dilemma. While I realize now that I am no long angered by his actions of the past or really even the present - I am now in this strange world of trying to communicate when the opportunity arises.....but it is always met with jokes of anger. He says I just need to start acting like a wife again etc...my response is I am a wife, but we need to talk to figure this out and heal etc. When I walk away from whatever it is and don't get angry...HE gets angry and starts telling me how I am holding him down and will never let go of the past etc. I didn't say or do anything, I am just doing what I do with the kids or house etc. He is SO SO angry....my one thought is that he expects it just to fade away back to the norm without ever talking and that scares me because I can't do that. Today he said he was going to get his own place where someone actually cares about him? I said that I do care, but if that is what you need to do then go ahead. I do not have the energy or the desire to argue anymore....in fact probablly what is scaring me a little more is my entire lack of feelings toward the situation. I just don't care......unless he is going to make an effort to be the man that I need - loving and caring, then I just don't have the heart to try for both of us anymore. Anyway......it makes me thing of the king-baby thing......either he is treated like the king or he acts like a baby....and I have NO more desire to treat him like a king when he doesn't deserve it.....hopefully this makes sense. Anyone else understand where I am and how to move forward...>I guess that is it....how do I move from my total lack of feelings toward trying with him.....how do I move forward??