hello there.
i think what you are going through is very normal for an alcoholic.
booze was my "solution" to life.....so take that away and after the initial "pink cloud" of being away from the stuff,things can get pretty grim.
i hated all the happy folk,now im one of them,but only through hard work.
i didnt want to ask someone to be my sponsor,levelling of pride and all that and doing things my way all my life it was against the grain.
but after going to AA meetings nearly every day and sometimes twice,calling 4,5,6,folk a day from the fellowship after a month i drank again.i can assure you i didnt want to.i am powerless.i realised after that last drink that my life depended on getting a sponsor and working the steps.
so i made a descision to put as much work into getting well as i did in my drinking career.
we dont get well in the rooms by osmosis im afraid.we have to ask for help and get to work.
you are in my prayers..