Thank you for the support. It is hard to admit to yourself, it is like something has beaten you and I feel shame that I can't have self-control like other people. Somedays I don't drink so much, just a 2 or 3 drinks and because of that I feel, will I am not drinking a bottle of vodka before lunch time so I have no problem. Honestly I don't know how much I am drinking I forget. I am not so bed at home with my wife when I drink at home. It is almost normal drinking but when I go out it is a different story.