Thanks hps for taking the time to offer your advice. 18 months, wow that seems like a lifetime to me at this point. Similar to some other posts I like the general tone of the answers. You can do this, life will get better and your point about being able to handle stress better really resonated with me.
Many times when I am jonesing for a drink it is because I am stressed out about something: the boss being a hardass, the kids screaming, the wife being angry about me having too much to drink, the freaking dog pooping on the neighbors lawn or whatever. My answer? Grab a beer. It has been shown that is not an ideal solution, in fact is a very poor choice for stress release. Another importnat lesson I have gleaned off this site.
I thank you very much,
jack
Originally Posted by
hps 
Welcome! I believe I have a similar age/job/family to yours, but am now about 18 months sober. I found the initial few months being sober quite hard, an emotional roller coaster (you can read up on PAWS). So you may want to prepare for this and also consider a support network such as AA meetings.
Below are my answers to your questions:
Q: Will I be a happier & healthier person?
A: I feel a lot better about myself. Life has been tough for me lately, so not sure whether I'm happier, but I'm much more able to deal with the stresses. Plus I have a huge feeling of accomplishment for kicking the booze habit.
Q: How do I fight the urge to order a drink when I walk into a cozy bar and hear the buzz of conversation and the familiar clinking of glasses?
A: I just order large glasses of Diet Coke or Sprite. I actually enjoy bars more now (though frequent them less) because I don't have to be anxious about getting booze, getting enough booze, or getting too much booze into my system.
Q: What are the benefits you think I will realize (besides the not making an ass of myself or waking up with a hangover)?
A: Self-esteem, self-respect, ability to manage stresses and problems.
Q: What do I replace a cold beer with as a reward for say mowing the lawn on a hot day?
A: Cold soda works for me.
Q: What am I going to do with all my spare time when I am not drinking?
A: I went to lots of AA meetings initially, which helped fill the spare time, and more importantly helped me cope (as I no longer had booze to help me cope). Now I just tend to do more of what I did before, cooking, reading, talking to my kids...
Q: What do I tell my friends when I go over and they offer me a beer and I say no thanks?
A: I'm not drinking, or I'm on Diet Cokes at the moment.
Q: How do I have fun when I go out with a bunch of people to a bar?
A: Because I don't have all the booze anxieties, I am more relaxed and can talk to people more.
Q: I'm a generally shy person and admittedly have used alcohol as a "crutch" in social situations. How am I going to overcome that and conquer my fear without alcohol?
A: I am pretty quiet myself. But now, instead of getting anxious about my quietness, I no longer worry about it. If I have one or two interesting conversations in an evening, I figure I'm doing pretty well. And if sometimes I am quiet and am not talking to people, that is ok too. This is where feeling good about myself helps out as well.