First I would like to thank all of you for your honest comments! I am glad I found this site and am able to talk to people who understand. I sure can't talk to many of my friends (drinking buddies) as they would just say "Hey dude you dont drink all the time so don't worry about it." As we get wasted on a Saturday night".
In fact right now in the back of my head there is this little voice saying "Hey the Buckeyes are playing tonight! It's Friday and we can all throw back some cold ones and root them on!"
It's easy knowing what you should do but so damn hard to make yourself do it.
About 8 years ago I got a DUI and lost my license for 6 months. During that time I had random alchohol screening so I quit for the whole 6 months. It was during Browns season so it was real difficult to do but I still did it. Seems like I need a little of that will power now.
I want to change believe me. I also grew up in a home where my dad would stop by the bar on the way home from work and not show up till 8 or 9 in the evening. He would sometimes fight with my mom about it and it did get physical. I remember hitting him when I was about 7 or 8 and telling him "You leave my mom alone!!" He pretty much quit drinking on his own about 5 years later but he was about 58 by then. After that he mellowed out and we started having a somewhat decent relationship.
I dont want to let it get that far. My daughter is older than I was when my dad quit. The fact that I'm 44 and he was 58 means that I could continue this until I have grandchildren and then who knows what shape I'd be in.
I dont think it is going to happen over night but I hope now that I found this site It will be eaisier. With good people like you guys to talk to maybe I can shake this demon at some point.
Thanks Again!
Jerry