I was also a bad drunk, now its time to start to make some changes for the better.
Stay close to SR & keep sharing your thoughts and just dont pick up for today.
I just went to my second AA meeting tonight & it was a wonderful experience, talking with & hearing others stories really seemed to make things better.
Before my first meeting I called a local AA hot-line & chatted to a great guy on the other line. He then had someone come by to take me to a local meeting. This person is now my sponsor (not pushing AA on you or anything... I just wanted to share my recent experience).
All of the best in your recovery