Hi armaviva
I think you're in the very best place to find help - you'll find a lot of support and good advice here - as you've already seen
Labels aren't bull - but they can be if we use them as excuses to not do anything.
I drank all day everyday for about 5 years but I never accepted I was an alcoholic - I figured I just 'had that lifestyle'.
I figured it was just a phase and I'd sort myself out eventually and stop abusing alcohol.
That *was* bull, in my case.
What I wasn't admitting to myself was that drinking was damaging me both mentally and physically and I needed to address that problem - much more urgently than I needed to put a label to it.
Coming here and reading and posting helped me work out what I needed to do. Suki and others have already given some pretty good suggestions.
I hope we can help you work out some stuff too
Welcome to SR
D