Reggie-
First of all, what Carol said.
Detoxing from alcohol is rough and it should be done under a doctor's supervision.
If you have been drinking heavily for a long time it may well be best done inpatient.
The fear of failure is a common one and completely understandable on top of being nothing to be ashamed of.
And even if you do slip while you are trying to stop that only means you have swerved on the road.
Not driven completely into a ditch.
You know you have a problem....what a huge first step!
Begin working to manage this problem and you will have joined the club with the highest membership on Earth.
This forum and others like it are great, but IMHO you also need to be in a room face to face with others struggling with addiction.
For that purpose AA meetings can hardly be beat.
I personally have some "philisophical differences" with AA but it still gave me the
invaluable opportunity to be around friendly, attractive, funny, happy and healthy looking people who shared my addiction.
That experience alone was priceless and I will be forever in their debt for it.
I wish you all the best and has previously been said, you are SO not alone.
You have taken the first step and for many that is the hardest.
For many others, it is unfortunately impossible.
Stay on the path and you'll find that the scenery just gets better the farther you go.