Sheesh Mike! That is a lot to handle for sure and as you said, you are 50 years old and have drank daily for how long. Of course you want a drink, BUT you know where that drink will take you and the consequences are not going to fix the situation you are in. A drink will put it off temporarily and then add to your set of worries.
Try (easy for me to say) to live in the present. Don't be looking at the "what ifs" yet. In other words don't put more worry on your plate because of what might be.
I did exactly the opposite of what I am preaching to you just this very morning. I logged on to our bank account and it was husband's pay day, BUT his check hadn't been deposited. His company is laying off like crazy and so I feared the worst and got all worked up for nothing. The problem turned out to be with our bank. We have NO savings and would be bankrupt if he lost his job. We aren't living high either, but we are living paycheck to paycheck.
I am sorry about your job, but at least you have something to fall back upon. I am sorry about your wife, but at least she can walk, breath, hug you, converse with you, and see. What I am clumsily trying to say is gratitude might help you too. I mean we are all grateful, but to really sit down and think about it and express it might help is all. You can believe all I felt is gratitude when I found out I misconstrued the paycheck incident.