((55438)) - I can only go by what my niece/nephew notice, which is EVERYTHING!! They are 8 and 4. The 8-year-old may have memories of "mommy falls asleep sometimes", meaning my stepsister passed out due to too many Klonopin. My "step-family" is rampant in addiction/alcoholism.
So, Congratulations on three months!!!! Though we can't undo what we've done, we can always show that, though we've made bad decisions...there are ways to change our ways and make better decisions.
I have another niece. She's 16. She's seen me as the RN with the convertible and the $$ who could buy her what she wanted. Then she saw me sink into a crack addiction.
Now, she sees me struggling to come back from that addiction and face the consequences of that addiction and she admires me. Her "dad" is an addict - facing a long term in prison.
I try to tell her that #1 - she did NOTHING to make her dad do what he did. That was HIS choice, HIS addiction. She doesn't understand why I "got it" and he didn't. I try to explain, but I really don't know how. Kids think that they are responsible for everything.
The only thing I know to do is give her a good role model, which amazes even me...the ex-crackhead being a "role model"..but I am.
Kids are resilient. They want to believe the best in their parent. I can't say what impact your past has had on your daughter, but I know that it amazes me, to this day, what an impact I have on my niece because I AM a recovering addict and she knows.
Hugs and prayers!
Amy