Today is 2 weeks without a drink. I am new here, and essentially new to life. I began drinking at 18, and began drinking every day by age 22. I can remember only 2 days that I didn't drink in the 19 years since then. For me, this is not about getting my life back, it is about discovering my life for the first time.
I used to go out & socialize, at bars. After 3 different arrests (2 were DWIs), I thought I had solved all of my problems by not drinking and driving. I stopped going out, content to drink myself to sleep at home, alone.
I never had any intention of quitting, I had it in my head that I deserved that cold beer after a hard day at work, to celebrate, to deal with stress, etc... There was always a good reason for drinking. I didn't need to drink at work and a neurologist diagnosed my shaking as a tremor. On days off, I usually waited until late afternoon to start drinking.
In December, I lost my job & things started to change. The time I allowed myself to start drinking became noon, and some days as early as 8AM. I started feeling the change in my body...my heart always racing and having trouble breathing. On Valentine's Day, I was shaking so bad that I was afraid to walk, so of course I had to drink to stop shaking. By Tuesday I was certain that I was going to die. I saw my shrink on Wednesday and I couldn't argue with his insistence that I check myself in for detox. Spending your first day of detox in the cardiac ward is quite the wake up call.
I am excited about a chance to finally be normal
Sorry for being so long winded....
I am happy to have found this site and look forward to meeting like-minded friends here.