Yeah I been drinking lots, nothing I couldnt handle in the past. I divorced 5 years ago, but I have had some really awesome parents and other family help support me, and get me through hard times. Yeah I started drinking lots about 3 years ago. I didnt have any friends in this new area I moved to, untill I met a few other really good people!! but we all lived in different city's so we had a spot where we would all hook up after work!! Of course in a bar in the closest city to all of us!!!I finally have a few friends after living here for a few years. Yes Im going out as much as I can!!! Im starting to get pulled out of this depression, and single mom guilt that I have had for a few years!!! Then a DUI hit
So Im a single working mom, with no social life all over again.. To those that dont understand...Imagine being home alone with Just your kids all the time!!! No wife or signifigant other around at all to help...It gets lonley...really lonely... I finally get the DUI out of the way!!! I start going to bars again!!! what the hell am I doing!?!? that DUI was the worst Expierence i have ever been through!!! I need a friend...a companion, thats not my son or my parents!!! Im not drinking like I was before, but im still drinking and driving none the less...Im accomplishing my goals!!! but still drinking too much...I have all my debt paid off, I bought a brand new car, And now Im talking myself out of the guilt I feel...Im a single mom right!! I need my time out, I should not feel guilty, what I am doing is perfectly normal...Well it is in my situation. I work in a casino, I hang out with casino employees and players....Our lives revolve around drinking and gambling. Well I finally talked myself out of feeling guilty every time I went out. Everything is cool, I do get a driver to take me home when I get too wasted. But still no difference between buzzed driving and drunk driving right?? Im still a single mom, the dad is no where to be found...dead beat dad...But I accomplished another great goal for single moms everywhere!!! I bought a house!!! So I got myself out of 30k worth of debt...Bought a new car at a 14% intrest rate to work on building my credit score back up, then bought a house!!! I still think my life is great right now!!! What kind of single mom do you know who does all that!?!? not many of us!!! I celbrate with drinks!!! LOTS of drinks!!! I blacked out that night, but I was told I had lots of fun!!! Everything is great anyway!!! But now both my parents lost there jobs within two weeks of each other, and had to move out of state...My best friend, and favorite babysitter moved out of state!!!
But Im still drinking Like I used too...Just now my son comes with me!!! I brought him to a beach party the other day...Was great fun!!! And my 6 year old son made almost $10 running into the cabin and bringing people beer!!! And I didnt drink lots that night, but I still was drinking and DROVE my son home!!! I find myself drinking everynight now, weather with friends or by myself...and my son is now in the middle of it...
Im a single mom here now, all by myself. My family lives out of state, and the only people I know in this area are alcoholics themselfs!!! Good people mind you...none would hurt a fly, but all drink...and LOTS!!! I cant afford to take the time off work for any kind of rehab...I need to work, to pay my morgage and support my son...But my drinking has gone too far. Im afraid of the lonliness again...Its already killing me, that I have no one to share the accomplishment of being a home owner with!!! why Im drinking more then normal, I just need some kind of support, and maybe some advice, on where I can meet new people to help support me with quitting drinking. My friends now will encorage me to not drink, while they all take shots...they wont poor me one!!! but heck, its hard... what can I do!?!?