SCAMY04

DAY 8 Ifeel good exept what i guess is liver pain or some kind of dull ache under my ribs but yester day only felt it a couple times unlike day two when it was off and on all day and night .kind of scary . Anyways other than that I feel good. I sleep deep feel rested over all a sense of well being exept nagging pain that comes and goes. I was looking in the mirror early and noticed how open and white my eyes look white and crisp not hazy and squinted my overall complection looked better. I Noticed i didnt have a swollen look or that tired look I actually looked younger exept I notice my hair line looks to receeding i never noticed that before. Also I went to my childrens bedrooms last night . i have 11 year old twin boys and 4 year old girl which is a big daddys girl but watching them sleep i started to think why would i risk my life or years off my life for something so stupid.How could i do this to them I love so much.Ive always coached and sports hunting fishin ect Just like I did with my dad but my dad didnt drink On weekends I always would have a beer drink all day and half the night till i ran out or passed out.My boys would always tell me and my brother why you drink its bad for you I always pretended it was normal yeah 20 to 30 beers or more a weekend plus a teelve pack at least once during the week thats not normal.NOT to mention when drank every day before marrying. Why did I feel i had to drink the urge to drink look for any reason to drink look foward to drinking so much plan things around drinking .Well i wonder will I still enjoy camping boating grilling football which I love WILL they still appeal to me or bring on urges or cravings. I also worry about my brother unlike mine his wife drinks heavy they drink every day and have for fifteen years hard stuff beer ect. although were close and always have been I NO he will brush me off or say hes not an alcoholic or why you on this kick . I ALSO have some anxiety Ive always been sort of a worry kind of person but latly its diffrent like about the little pains I WAS talking about. will all this pass is it normal any advice