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Old 02-27-2010, 03:39 AM
  # 6 (permalink)  
WantsOut
Becoming a Butterfly
 
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Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 904
Hi saneagain - I can share my experience. In the summer of 2006 I had had enough. My AH was drinking constantly, was nothing but an unconsious lump on our couch who we lived around as if he was a piece of furniture, and was even calling in sick to his six figure job so he could stay home and drink. I once listened in horror as he did a conference call while slurring.

Finally, after years of the usual BS, I kicked him out. He quit drinking, romanced me, suddenly wanted to be lovers again, etc etc. I went through the same horror you're going through - will he or won't he, does he mean it, can we ever get over this?

In the end once he realized I was seriously gone, he got worse than ever - got DWI #3, and ruined his excellent credit buying ridiculous stuff he didn't need (kayak anyone?), maxing out his cards, etc.

Here we are three years later. He emailed me at 5 AM a few weeks ago to tell me what a horrible person I am. He was clearly wasted. I haven't even spoken to him in over a year. this was followed by a valentine's day text to tell me if I ever wanted to get together to let him know. Yeah - whatever.

Nothing changed him - not losing his wife and home, not a DWI that cost him about $20k, nothing. One day, if and when he's had enough, then he'll change.
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