New to the site. My wife is an acoholic and I need help.
I am learning that no matter how unique and entrenched our situation is, there almost seems to be a script for it. I know she needs help, and that means I need help too. I've all but lost my ability to handle this.
My wife drinks to blackout any night not sick from the last time ... usually 4 or 5 times a week. I don't need to go into all of the bad things that have happened as a result, but you all can probably imagine. In the mornings, she knows there's a problem, but as soon as the sun goes down it all starts up, and there's no way to stop that train.
She has a mental disorder that makes her extremely scared of public situations. Alcohol anonymous has come up, but it scares her to no end to be around people she doesn't know, especially in the setting she imagines. I've talked her into going to an online chat meeting, but here are the issues:
1. I don't think she truly understands that there is a problem, despite how obvious it is ... she never remembers what happens.
2. I am an atheist, and she's more of an agnostic ... the point being that everything 12-step just doesn't speak to us in a meaningful way. I've spoken to a couple of qualified people about the issue, and they just say "well there's your problem" ... it isn't.
So, I haven't even looked around here yet, I just want to start off with maybe some advice on where to go and what to ask, and maybe how to listen ... anything. I love my wife so much, but I can't live this way any longer. I have no idea what to do.