lostmyway, first of all, here......
I have recently started working in a sober residential facility and relapses happen there too. Some of the girls have several months and go back out. I do not think any less of them than I do you. Get back up, dust yourself off and know that your 48 days still meant something. Believe that!!!
Think of what it was that got you, talk to your sponsor, share at a meeting and of course, keep reading here.
I think most of us have gone through the relapse thing and it's a learning process. Remember, "progress, not perfection" and this is another step in getting and staying sober. Hope you're feeling better soon.