SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information - View Single Post - Girlfriend of Crack/Heroin Addict -Gets robbed at knifepoint.

02-08-2010, 10:54 PM

# 5 (permalink)

CrackQuack

Member

Join Date: Mar 2009

Location: Dayton, OH.

Posts: 879

Quote:

Originally Posted by nicegirl

I am 27 yrs old, a nice girl, christian, have a sucessful career a good social life and involved in a lot of activies but by meeting me you'd never guess.......

My man is a crack addict and is in jail now for robbing me at knifepoint, and has stolen many things before this incident. I pressed charges knowing he could face 7 years in jail. He got 2 and is coming out in June. Hes been clean for 8 months. (theres a lot of drugs in jail) . Ive been visiting him every month. He is the NICEST goodhearted guy youd ever meet when not on drugs, when using he does terrible things. I've been with him over 12 years and was with him BEFORE he turned to a drug addict. He is deeply deeply ashamed of what he has done. For those who are going to say "just walk away" I need to reiterate I LOVE him very much. The past 2 years in jail have been the lonliest times in my life, friends do not stick by you -and let me tell you 2 years of lonliness hurts more than getting robbed at knife point.

If there is anyone else with a similar experience to me- let me know know you deal with this!!!

Thanks

First, welcome to SR! I am CrackQuack, crack cocaine addict, 1 year clean. I am so glad you've found SR!
Usually, I do not post in the F&F forum, nor read, but on those nights I cannot sleep..
Anyway, second, THANK YOU for not running at the first word "RUN". It's not easy, by any means, to be with a crack addict. One VERY unkind NYC officer (from another forum) not only told my boyfriend to run, but to tell me to go suck someone else off for my fix (and I had been clean for 10 months when he wrote that). He also was happy to tell my boyfriend that living with me means I will rob him and use again. That I will never stop and being with me is like swimming with sharks with no cage.
And it -could- be like that, but no need to say that it's gotta. I truly hope he has hit his bottom and will continue to stay clean once he is out! For the sake of both of you.
Make sure you keep coming back, maybe check into some nar anon meetings and introduce the idea of checking out some NA meetings to your boyfriend, if he's not already heard of them.
And maybe some couple's therapy.
But the most important thing I read, over and over, for non-addicts who are living with addicts, is to take care of yourself first. Love is powerful, but active addiction can and will trump love any day of the week.
Make sure both of you have a plan for yourselves before he gets out.
I, personally, never got arrested. I got extremely lucky. But I did OD twice. Again, extremely lucky. Something I may not have if I go back out and use again.
And I do notice, the more clean time I have, the more my love for my boyfriend and his love for me is a part of what keeps me going and working on my recovery.
Again, welcome to SR! This is such a wonderful, supportive, site. I hope you find what you need here and that you enjoy being here with the rest of us. :ghug3
And we do recover. We're never recovered. But we can get and stay clean. I am one crack addict who is making it. One day at a time! I will keep your boyfriend in my thoughts and prayers that he makes it too. As well as you, too!!!!