Well, I drank last Friday night because it was a co-workers birthday. I guess I'm not strong enough to say no to having a drink in those situations yet. I don't know how to just go out and not drink. Maybe I just shouldn't put myself in those situations yet. Anyway, after my first beer it was all over from there. It was beer after beer after shot after shot and so on. I ended up totally blacking out and waking up somewhere that was not my house and being 30 minutes late to work.
The feeling I had while at work was awful. I felt ashamed, guilty, dirty, careless, and just plain rotten. Why was I so out of control the night before? It's like the days I had been sober were just slowly gaining up momentum for me to bottom out again.
Well, last night was a huge tester for me. My roommate was gone, I was off work and off work the next morning. Thursday nights where I live are awesome bar nights. The old me would have gone out, got a 12 pack, drank a little before heading out on the town and then finishing off the beer I had when I got back. Instead I came to this forum and hung out here for awhile, and went and worked out. And when I woke up this morning I felt like a million bucks!
I know I have a long ways to go, but I feel like I am making huge strides. Just thought I would share.
