Some great suggestions posted here. Pretty much exactly what was suggested to me. Finding someone who has what i want was the biggest thing. Before my last relapse i was determined to find a sponsor who was just like me. I felt i needed a sponsor who approached life as i do and that the same spiritual beliefs. So i waited and waited and searched and surveyed for 100 days or so without a sponsor. Things were good. Then some real life stuff showed up and i didn't have a sponsor with some experience, strength, and hope in this way of life to help me. I was sponsoring myself. I was sponsoring a dam fool. I promptly relapsed.
What i've learned is that a sponsor doesn't have to be my friend, though mine is. My sponsor doesn't ahve to be like me. A sponsor simply guides me through the steps and is a person to take my personal stuff to that i don't share at meetings. Now i did make sure that my sponsor had taken all the steps and hade some significant clean time, but that just goes back to having what i want.
Another thing that helped me in that vein was listening closely when people shared. I took note of those who shared their experience, strength, and hope in the first person and dind't preach. That helped me determine who was really living the program and not just spouting platitudes.
The important thing is to get a sponsor without delay. Early recovery can be brutal. I know this from vast experience with going back out and coming back in. I don't intend to ever do that again. Sponsorship is the heartbeat of the fellowship. Good luck finding yours.