Old 02-04-2010, 07:17 AM
  # 5 (permalink)  
outtolunch
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Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Chicago area
Posts: 4,269
Originally Posted by sct8517 View Post

She told me it was nothing i did, but that she just wanted to be alone and find herself..... Believe her.

She repeated over and over to me that shes broken and doesn't know how to love, and doesn't know how to love her self...... Believe her.

I feel like i want to see a therapist but i don't have the money to spend on one..

You had money to date and buy her suboxone. Use the money you would have spent, having face to face time with a therapist.

She said... cause i love him and always will i just didn't want to hurt you and like being with you.. Believe her.

I drive by her apt knowing full well that her ex is there cause i see his car and just wonder whats going on.. Sometimes he doesn't stay there but i still drive by and want to get out of my car and throw a rock at her window so she looks out or knock on her door.. Now this is just weird...you are stalking her. Stop it before you make yourself sick or get into trouble with the law.

So what can i do for her now, what i want to help her, i know she will be a good person, mother, friend, companion in life.

This is a hopeful fanasty.
Take drugs out of this, for a moment. Sounds like you have known her for 2 months and fell head over heels. Then you learned you really did not know her at all, given she is just not that into you. And this really, really sucks.

Please consider hooking up with a grief counselor and get some face to face support for codependency. Just because you love someone does not mean they have to love you back, the same way. Just because you love someone, does not mean you have any control over them or what they do, or not.

You sound like a good guy who deserves to treat himself better than you have been doing. Heal thyself.
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