SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information - View Single Post

02-01-2010, 07:56 PM

# 4 (permalink)

serenityqueen

Attitude of Gratitude

Join Date: Sep 2007

Location: Dayton, Ohio

Posts: 2,305

I'm all too familiar with the love/hate relationship with pain pills. They were "my everything" for 25 years.

Quote:

There is also the mystery of when I start feeling really good, my mind trys to trick me into telling me by taking a pill I'd feel even better. Can someone tell me why this happens? It's mind boggling! I even wake up dreaming I'm on a good high! Lordy, Lordy!

I don't think it's so much your mind that tries to trick you, it's the disease of addiction. This disease is very smart, very smooth and very, very patient. It waits for just the right time to rear it's ugly head. I used when I was happy, when I was sad, when I was lonley, when I was bored, when I was angry, when I was tired, . . . To make a long story short, I didn't need a reason to use.

Addiction to prescription narcotics is becoming more and more common. There are many people on here who can identify with the way you're feeling. Have you been to any NA or AA Meetings? SR is a fantastic means of support, but I feel going to Meetings where you can meet other women who struggle with addiction as well is vital. Get phone numbers of other women and call at least one of them each day so you're comfortable calling so when the disease is really screaming at you, you can reach out to one of them. I tried many, many times to do this alone and each time I went straight back to the comfort of the pills.

But getting clean and staying clean is possible. I'm happy to say that I have been in Recovery for 4.5 years. But I reached out for help, just like you're doing. I hope you'll keep sharing as much as you're comfortable with. Read some of the other posts and I'm sure you'll find others who you can relate to.

God Bless,
Judy