Sounds perfectly normal. Something that people often say at AA, something I often cringe at actually, is "don't think." But that can be good advice, although sometimes easier said than done. Like Dee said, what works for me in those situations is living in the moment, the day or what not. I can't control my drinking much better than I can control my life as long as I am trying to. It takes some getting used to, but instead of having internal debates with yourself try to practice just shutting it down and accepting whether you want this or not it is going to work out in one way or the other. Working on acceptance is a good starting point for any recovery in my opinion. Good luck