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02-01-2010, 03:29 PM

# 12 (permalink)

sofacat

work in progress

Join Date: Sep 2009

Location: the sunshine state

Posts: 623

When we codependents are separated from our DOC- "The addict" We experience our own type of withdrawal from them and the chaos. The quiet and the lonely nights are our worst enemy, just like addicts. We are addicts too, just without the drugs and alcohol. Fear is our trigger, panic is our trigger, suspicion is our trigger, loneliness is our trigger, loss of control is our trigger, guilt is our trigger...hell, their "triggers" are our triggers! We have a long list of triggers...we are very needy people.

When I went into "crisis" mode...I literally stayed on this site every waking minute I could, and went to meetings...still do. It helps...it all helps.

I still miss him- he was the one I called to tell everything to, from stupid things to very important things, he is the one I used to feel comfortable crying to and telling my fears to, and he was the only person who could make me feel better. He has hurt me, but he has loved me a lot more.

Why wouldn't he be those things to you? You're paying his bills and making sure everything stays ***** dory in his life...he!!, you even helped him stand up. I'd be a great friend to anyone who was doing those things for me too. Where does that leave you in all of this? Lonely and a little bit poorer.

You said it best yourself..."I knew he was taking over my life".

...good friends won't do that.

Just a thought.