Cheapshot,
You sound exactly like me. I would drink 1/2 a Ltr. per night, and quit frequently. I'd finish a bottle one night with the intention of it being my last. The next morning, I'd get up and be fine with the idea of not drinking. By the time I got off work I would be in a flat out argument with myself over getting a bottle.
If I managed to win the argument and go home without visiting the liquor store, I would end up napping on the couch because I was bored without the booze. When my wife got home from work, I'd get up but would be restless and irritated constantly.
I'd get angry over the stupidest things. If the coffee filter didn't slide in right the first time, I'd slam the coffee pot around and swear a lot. That sort of thing. This would go on for as long as I didn't drink.
I made it about 3 months a few years ago because I wasn't trying to quit drinking, I was trying to quit smoking, and didn't think I could do it if I were drinking. Eventually I went back to both. Since then, the intervals of sobriety have been shorter and shorter. I use to go 3, 4, maybe 5 days and either I would find some disaster in my life to justify drinking, or I would find something to celebrate to justify drinking. Or, I would be so grouchy my wife would bring a bottle home just so she could stand to be around me.
When I finally gave up quiting, when I hit my bottom and realized that I could NEVER quit on my own, then I started thinking about ending my life. I was looking for some sort of suicide hotline on the internet, and somehow found this site. You can read my first post here:
First Post/Step I guess
The people on this site gave me the courage to go to an AA meeting that very day. I am SO grateful, I can't express it in words.
I now have 2 1/2 months of sobriety, and I did have those feelings of depression, restlessness, and irritability, but I've learned they will pass. I've also learned how to deal with my emotions without suppressing them with alcohol.
I encourage you to try an AA meeting. At least one. If you don't identify with 90% of the people there, I'd be amazed. The program really works. People are fond of saying it's not the only way, but I think it's the easiest way.
Good Luck! and keep us posted!