Old 01-31-2010, 08:59 AM
  # 17 (permalink)  
NEOMARXIST
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Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 2,013
Hi Intention. Yes you have just reminded me of how my alcoholism progressed. It progresses very quickly and drinking as soon as you wake creeps in very quickly. I found once you do this then there is NO turning back.

I tried towards the last 12 months but as soon as I woke all I could think about was taking another drink. If there was any around then I would crack open a can of lager at 7.00am and be round the shop buying super-strength lager 9% at 7.45am. I would make sure I saved beers for this purpose. Totally and utterly powerless over doing this as I was totally and utterly addicted.

This never crossed my mind a few years earlier. I got introduced to it from a close mate and I remember him cracking a bottle of wine at about 6.30am and me thinking oh great I've never thought of just drinking through days. Why suffer the hangover? Only an alkie would think like that and when I see people at work who have been out the night before drinking I can see how they are not thinking about alcohol but quite the opposite infact, they are positively sickened at the thought when they are hungover. For me ALL I could think about when hungover was taking another drink to make me feel better again.

I also related to your "down in one" as proably the last 18 months of my drinking almost every single drink would be chugged down pretty much in one. I physically couldn't help but drink like that after I had taken a few drinks. Felt like a magnetic force was pulling it down my throat... I knew I was totally addicted.

I knew I had to get out whils't I still could and rebuild my life which had been damaged but wasn't irrepairable. My drinking would have progressed to daily drinking 24/7 very quickly I imagine if circumstances had of been different. Once that line is crossed there will never be a return to "normal" responsible drinking. Not for this alcoholic anyway.
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