I don't like the feeling of guilt I have for drinking the next day. Its ruined relationships, my grades have been affected and my body has been beaten. It is not a good thing and I just want to be well again. Not to mention the withdraws from alcohol are crucial and something that I never want to experience again. It is just not worth it.
I remember being in my car on the highway when all my illusions broke to peices. My mind raced through years and years of the obvious hold alcohol had on me. I was in utter shock. I had no idea until that moment.
Same thing happend to me once.. Except I know I hit two cars in the parking lot of a grocery store. Moved one out of it's spot a good three feet. Plenty of spectators for that one. I thought for sure I'd get a knock at the door. Never came.
It sounds like you're at just the right spot. Finding a local meeting would place you in the next right spot. There's so many people out there who's strength you can draw from.