hi frank and welcome to SR
I hope you'll check out the 'Friends and Family' forum here.
It's a lively group.
At the top of the forum,
you'll see what we (they) call 'stickies'
(I know - I don't know for sure why they're called that either)
that give important and helpful advice for those just coming into recovery.
We come into recovery from a multitude of directions.
Your post reads like you're going to be making some very
important and possibly permanent decisions in your near furture.
Hopefully this will give you a place to start.
The people over there understand and know first hand what you're
feeling and even sometimes what your'e thinking about your situation.
C'mon over!
the Solution is fine!