Originally Posted by soberinwpg

Only you can decide is right.
Paxil caused huge cravings for me. Unfortunately I didn't figure this out until 2 bad relapses in 9 years. Each relapse I started Paxil a month earlier.
That being said denial is another one. If I honestly look back at my past alchhol filled that void in my soul, stopped the chaos in my brain and made me forget that I thought I was a worthless even before I thought I had a problem.
I am now in a place that I am working on those things. The steps, imo, are there to fill the hole, settle the brain and give me a fulfilling life.
I don't know what will happen to me if I have a drink or 2 now that I'm off Paxil and working my program but you know what? I don't even wanna risk it. I might get into a situation where I find I start and can't stop and that ain't worth a buzz. ugh. Why would I want to put that kind of fear into my life? I'm just getting rid of a lot of fears.
I enjoy life with out the chaos of "What if". My desire to test the waters is over. Just for today.