Hi Daphne,
I'm glad you are back, love.
We do understand what you are going through. There are plenty of hugs and support here.
Some AA meetings are "open" and that means that you do not have to be an alcoholic to go or have a desire to stop drinking. Why don't you see if you can find one in your area. Perhaps your partner would go with you to support you. Go along and see where you can relate to people rather than how you are different to them. You might meet someone so that you can have some face to face support. Just have an open mind.