I think you have already done all you can. I feel ya on the getting the anxiety when she calls too.
If it were me, I think I would just remind her that "I am trying to stay sober, I'm afraid if we hang out I'm going to pick up and I don't want to do that any more." Put it on you so it's not directed at her, know what I mean? Kind of let her off the hook kind of thing.
Take some deep breaths and be good to yourself. You are doing great.
