For myself personally, my husband drinks. He is not an alcoholic, but, a heavy drinker/weekend warrior, etc. During my journey, at different times, my house has been alcohol free, and not.
Until I realized that although alcohol was no longer in my body, but, still in my head, that obsession was not letting me live, happy, joyous and free. When I finally realized I was powerless over alcohol, period, mine, yours, his, hers..and fully surrendered to that, I wasn't able to remain sober.
AA is helping me live, survive and thrive in my sobriety even with a spouse that has chosen a different path.
All I can work on is changing me...with Gods grace.
Peace