Like a Broken Record...
Seperated from my AH about a month now...our conversations haven't changed one bit. I have tried to explain that in order for me to even try at this marriage he had to agree to 2 things 1. No drinking and 2. No name calling/put downs. I have said it a thousand different ways. His response is always, well at least your not the one who got kicked out. Not once has he acknowledged my hurt or boundaries, nor do I believe he intends to. It is like a cat and mouse game with him. I say this, he says that.....round and round. I suppose not much different than it has ever been with him. No real communication or feelings, just accusations and anger. I believe that he things that I will just fold....well I hate to break it to him...but not this time. The more time that goes by the more I realize he is incapable of having a realy emotion or feeling....he is so locked up inside himself. I acutally think that is very sad! My new year's resolution was to spend this year/time in finding strength in myself and providing the type of home my kids need. I was reading posts here today and it seems that a few of the AH's/ABF seem to at least acknowledge (whether meant to manipulate or not) their behaviors and the want to change....my AH...he can't do that at all - if I say you called me this or that...he would say well, I was mad...as if that would justify it. The reality he lives in is definately not the same reality the rest of the world lives in....2010 is going to be a year of happiness...that I know! Thank you all for your support and thoughts....it really clarifies my own thinking when I begin to doubt or feel unsure aobut the things happening in my life!! Happy New Year!