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Old 01-01-2010, 06:10 AM
  # 17 (permalink)  
NEOMARXIST
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Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 2,013
Granted, it can seem at times like it is pretty boring. Staying away from that first drink at all costs can seem pretty tedious at times, particularly around the festive period when it's all too easy to perceive that everyone is out having a great time partying whils't you ain't.

I went through the same thing myself but I stuck with sobriety as I ain't never going back to where I was when i was drinking and drugging. I feel great today, positive and that my future is in my hands to be crafted by myself and my actions. This time last year I was unemployed, had no job, terribly hungover and my face feeling like it was gonna drop off from all the cocaine and pills abuse of the past 18 months or so.

I really don't miss any of that at all and not being able to see a light at the end of the tunnel seemed incredibly boring and pointless, like the only light was the next binge. Horrible vicious circle. I had an appointment at the job centre on Jan 4th last year and just thinking about it makes me anxious. I was in a total, utter mess and I had already been saying I was quitting drinking for nigh on a good 12 months only to make 3 weeks max.

I really do think that a recovery 'plan' is required to maintain sobriety as although I have had my tough times in my mind over the last few weeks, when i actually think about it, although they have been fairly mundane with nothing outrages happening, the last 6 months of my sobriety have been some of the best of my life in many ways as it's been a journey of personal discovery and optimism that I really can change my life for the better. Thats not to say it's been easy, I had to consciously make the decision to stay away from that first drink on a daily basis and just suck it up at times and get through it. I even resorted to a bit of makeshift praying to the universe at my hardest points, whether it worked or not I don't know and don't really care tbh, I am sober and thats where my hope is coming from.

It's easy for memories of my drinking/using days to become distorted as I only can fantatsise about the plateua's and peaks of my binges but the aftermath was total and utter chaos and despair for myself and everyone around me.

I am glad to be out of that now but there will be times of boredom I think but you've just gotta steam through them inorder to stay sober IMO.
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