Looking forward to Jan1!!!
Well it's NYE. I have felt great today. Like all of the hard-work that I've put in over xmas period has paid off and it's all coming to an end and I can breathe again now!! I did it! made it through all of xmas and B'day, NYE sober!!
This is the first NYE that I am actually enjoying and not trying to beat the clock by running away from life and everything going on in it by getting totally blasted. Listening to all of 'Blood sugar sex magik' by RHCP not 'counting down' or any of that bullsh*t but just feeling great that I am gonna be starting a new decade with evrything to live for and free of the shackles of my alcohol and drug addiciton that has been very active over this period over the last few years.
Amazing how quick my mood can change, it's all about having faith that staying away from that first drink at all costs is gonna be worth it... I feel very satisfied at the moment but I think I deserve it after all of the anguish and pain I've been through during 'party' season.
I am actually not dreading new years day and waking from my usual (in the past) few hours of passout sleep with a thumping hangover and sore lips and blocked nose and head cold from all of the Coke that I shoved up there. Scratting around for an half empty can (of which there never would be any dregs at all left ! LOL)
Man feels good to be starting a new decade with no need for any pathetic, unobtainable resoltuions or none of that bullsh*t when feeling remorsefull about my alcohol and drug addiciton.
So glad I stuck with it through, but it was never really in doubt tbh as I had built significant defense from first drink, but my mind was going ten to the dozen at times.
Full of hope, serenity and positivity at the moment with 18 minutes till 12.00 o'clock strikes and you know what... I aint gotta run away from anything anymore!!!
peace, Love and Happy new year!!! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx