So, may I ask you ex-alcoholics a question? How is your life better now that you are sober? (even though this has probably been asked here before)
My worst day sober is better than my best day drinking. In over 20 years of drinking, I achieved nothing with my life. I have nothing to show for it. It's like groundhog day over and over. I didn't further my career or my education, didn't get married or have children. Being sober has been an opportuity for me to start becoming the person I want to be.
The first 3-4 months of sobriety was pretty boring. I thought I'd never have fun again and I'd be bored for the rest of my life. I'm pleased to say that that's no longer the case. I'm TOO busy and have a lot of new sober friends. I'm working on getting as fit as I can at the age of 40, planning a change of career and some overseas trips.
There's no reason you can't socialise and travel as a sober person.
I get that alcohol helps you to feel confident in meeting women and socialising, but with some recovery, you'll find that you'll be able to establish genuine rapport with people, rather than shallow, alcohol fuelled passing connections. The former will enrich your life and the latter will leave you still feeling alone and isolated, like you are now. Where are the genuine friends? The friends who are there whether you are drinking or not? If a friendship depends on both of you drinking to keep it alive, it's not a real friendship
If I detox for a few weeks every year, what is wrong with spending my evenings wrapped up in the warmth and happiness that alcohol gives me?
The warmth and happiness is an illusion. It's an artifical effect of alchol. It's not a warmth and happiness that comes up out of your soul and spreads through your life and touches those around you. Recovery can give you that kind of happiness. A reliance on alcohol for warmth and happiness is a slippery slope. If you are truly alcoholic, your drinking will get worse. It's a progressive and fatal disease. If you keep chasing the buzz alcohol gives you, you'll never know real happiness. What alcohol gives you is an illusion as it gradually takes away your self-esteem, your self-respect, maybe even your job, your home etc. It's hard to see what effect alcohol is having on you when you are in the grips of the disease. I was homeless at one stage becasue of my drinking but I had no idea the drinking was the problem. I just didn't see it.