Good for you Charlie. Just remember to keep taking in fluids, ie water, gatorade, etc to replace the fluids you are 'sweating out' with toxins in them.
Ok when you surrender and I want to surrender. Who or what do you surrender too
I surrendered to KING ALCOHOL my MASTER. I finally admitted to the core of my being that alcohol had beat me. Once I did that, then the 'acceptance' in Step 1 that I was powerless over alcohol and that when I drank my life became totally unmanageable became possible. Acceptance to the core of my being to build a very firm solid foundation in Step 1. A foundation built of concrete and granite not sand, as the rest of the steps would be built on that foundation.
What helped me tremendously was I did a "Time Line" of my 24 years of drinking, so that I could see in Black and white the PROGRESSION of my servitude to King Alcohol.
Starting at 12 having a Cocktail with my folks in the evening (my mother wanted me to learn how to control and enjoy my drinking so some fellow couldn't take me out and get me drunk and do what he wanted as i was physically mature) and the 'Time Line" ending at 3 week shy of my 36 birthday with the TOD being put on my medical chart in the ER of Olive Hospital.
Seeing that 'Time Line', the progression, the jobs lost, the homes lost, the husband lost, the fancy cars and diamonds lost, and ending up living on the streets the last year and a half, went a long way in helping me to 'surrender'. King Alcohol totally beat me.
I do believe a 'Time Line' might help. However, before attempting that, on your own, go to some more meetings, get the AA pamphlet about "Sponsorship" and find a sponsor who has not only worked the steps, and has a sponsor but 'seems' to be walking the way he is talking.
Hope that helps a bit.
Welcome to the World of Recovery. You are starting a journey that will literally blow your socks off!
Love and hugs,