Originally Posted by
yeahgr8 
that scared me it was the prospect of having to wake up feeling how i did another morning...
Ya trying to imagine another 40 years of it, only slowly getting even worse every month as the years go by...
Yeah and well he meant drunk or sober. I was like 5 days abstinent, trying to figure out if I was done or not, when he pointed that out.
It got to where I just had that thick dark cloud they talk about around me ALL the time.
p. 151:
"For most normal folks, drinking means conviviality, companionship and colorful imagination. It means release from care, boredom and worry. It is joyous intimacy with friends and a feeling that life is good. But not so with us in those last days of heavy drinking. The old pleasures were gone. They were but memories. Never could we recapture the great moments of the past. There was an insistent yearning to enjoy life as we once did and a heartbreaking obsession that some new miracle of control would enable us to do it. There was always one more attempt - and one more failure.
The less people tolerated us, the more we withdrew from society, from life itself. As we became subjects of King Alcohol, shivering denizens of his mad realm, the chilling vapor that is loneliness settled down. It thickened, ever becoming blacker. Some of us sought out sordid places, hoping to find understanding companionship and approval. Momentarily we did - then would come oblivion and the awful awakening to face the hideous Four Horsemen - Terror, Bewilderment, Frustration, Despair. Unhappy drinkers who read this page will understand!"