I too can very much relate to your post as that was also me.
Over the past few months, I have been re-evaluating my concept of a "high functioning alcoholic". When I first stopped drinking, I needed the concept of a HFA as a way to help me differentiate myself from the low bottom drunks.
But, as I have gotten more experienced, I learned that the difference is really where we each have gotten off that downward elevator. HFA's get less support from people around them (sometimes), because they haven't had the typical symptoms -- and for me, this was hard. But, once I realized that I was stopping drinking for me alone, then I saw the gift that I had... the gift of being able to stop before worse things happened to me.
One of my favorite books that helped early in my sobriety is called: Understanding the High-Functioning Alcoholic: Professional Views and Personal Insights; by Sarah Allen Benton.
My disease was progressing just like any other alcoholics.
Now, I no longer identify myself as an HFA (unless I am working with someone else and this helps us to identify with one another). I identify myself as an alcoholic who is one drink away from being right back on that elevator that stops six feet under.
I found that life was a lot better without alcohol and I am much more content than when I was drinking. And, it gets easier ...