mtnmagic

My name is Marie and I am an alcoholic.

I joined this site in December 2006 and the most sobriety that I have been able to pull together was 40 days.

That was with the help of AA every single day.

Funny thing, through these years I come here almost daily. I just read and hope and then do nothing to help myself.

I would like to help myself stay sober.

I can't describe the fear, anxiety and pain in my life, yet I know that many of you know exactly how I feel.

So I will reach out one more time. I will go to a meeting tomorrow.

There is no horrible consequences as a result of my drinking except to myself.
I'm not in the trouble with the law. I still have my job, though I don't know how. Financially is not good, but I can make ammends as I have to.

I can't stand the emotional pain anymore of drinking. It really boils down to that. I would kill myself except for the pain it would cause my two sons. So
it is time to be humble and ask for help. Please help. You don't have to be nice, just help guide me to a sober life. I am willing.