Sara, AA alone is probably not going to do anything for you at this point. I would suggest you look into inpatient rehab programs. I don't know how you go about doing this in Canada, but you should probably start with either a doctor, a therapist, or an addiction counselor. Or better yet since you don't sem to like doctors, try the internet. If you Google "Alcohol Rehabilitation Canada" you're going to find a lot of information about centers, programs, costs, etc. But let me give you a little more advice - stop with the negative attitude. People here are trying to help you. You should at least be a little grateful for that. And perhaps it's time you should start doing something besides complaining. Get on the internet. Get the information you need and then decide for yourself what you're going to do. As I said earlier today, you can keep doing what you're doing and stay miserable, or you can take the advice offered by the people here who are trying to help you. Once again, it's a choice.