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Old 12-08-2009, 07:17 PM
  # 12 (permalink)  
Snarfblak
TinaBina
 
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Join Date: May 2009
Location: Radford, Virginia
Posts: 12
Hey,
I had the same story pretty much. I didn't drink all that often or use a whole lot as compared to A LOT of people. I tried to quit many times on my own and although I couldn't in the long term, sometimes I could go a couple weeks with nothing. I usually got hangovers after drinking, but only suffered withdrawal a couple times and even then I did not want to drink to make me feel better. Only those closest to me would indicate that they thought I had a problem.
I had a lot of people around me that used like i did or worse, which made me feel like I couldn't possibly have a problem. There was another side of me that considered it though, and really did think I had a problem. I mean, I didn't really care about drinking a whole lot, but if I started to run out of weed I was in a panic. It wasn't really that I needed to do it at the time. I just wanted it available if I decided I needed it. I often set limits that I couldn't abide by. I won't do it during the day, during the week, during this duration of time etc. These frustrated people around me and myself. My drug use along with my depression really got in the way of my process of growing up. I had a lot of issues and wasn't very dependable. While in college I decided that I wanted to quit for school. I had gone on a bender that progressed through my first semester and after that I felt I needed to clean up. I started going to meetings. I didn't get it at first. I would come to meetings and share. I would pick up a white chip and stay sober until break. During breaks I would go home and party with my sisters. Eventually I realized that I wasn't getting anything out of AA while repeatedly relapsing. I finally decided I would try AA the AA way. I got a sponsor and started the steps. 10 months later I'm here and my life has improved drastically. I still have a lot of bad days, but they're getting better and I really feel like I'm growing up. I'm learning about myself and about life in general. AA is worth a try, if you don't like it they'll fully refund your misery. .
Keep coming back, fake it till you make it, meeting makers make it, let go and let god, It all works, if you work it
Tina
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