My exAH never owned anything either -- sounded much like your AH. I left him 13 years ago. Here's the thing: now our kids are 19 and 15 and in all those years he was verbally abusive and controlling with them as well. He even got physical with my son a few times. Never owned any of it. Never owned that his drinking was a problem. My younger one will not even speak to him anymore .... she's PISSED that he never one time accepted responsibility for his bad behavior and that he repeatedly chose alcohol over her. He still doesn't get it. He doesn't understand WHY she's being so "mean". Again, he's blaming everything on her, just like he's always blamed ALL of the crap on somebody else.
It's just my story, but for us that BS never ends.