I feel the same way today.. i feel like going to where i can get pills and just take so many that i feel NOTHING... i am sick of this icky feeling...i want to be numb and i miss it dang it....i do...but do i want to start over again and have my wonderful husband leave me...lose my home all i have for those damn pills to get numb....thisi too i pray shall passs i have been like this ALLLL day as well