"...I beleive I react differently to alchohol and therefore cant drink well..."
I'm with ananda on this one. Yes, I can see myself in AA's BB description of a 'real' alcoholic and it's differenciation from a 'hard' drinker and/or alcohol abuser.
I've always loved the little story [allegory (if you will)] that shows, to me anyway (and many others also), the difference between an alcoholic and a non-alcoholic (to heck with the 'real' 'hard' 'abuser' *&^$)( stuff).......:
Tom and Bob are friends and are going to meet after work for a couple of drinks, and to catch up on what's new in their respective lives. Now, Bob is our alcoholic, and Tom is our non-alcoholic.
When the first drinks are served, both Tom and Bob sip at their drinks and chat. HOWEVER, after a couple, when they start to feel the effects of the alcohol on their systems, Tom (our non-alcoholic) pushes away what's left of his current drink, and may even ask the bartender for a cup of coffee. Quite the contrary, Bob (our alcoholic) gets a big smile on his face, gulps down the remains of his drink (and may even reach over and grab what's left of Tom's), and then will announce to the bartender to........., "I'll have another (and another, and another, and another.....)."
Well, that was me......Bob. I still remember, while waiting for our wine to arrive at our table (in a fancy French restaurant in SF), reaching over to the table next to ours (these folks had left) and grabbing what was left of their wine (how could folks leave w/o finishing.....bacchus/dionysus would be so disappointed.
For me, it was real simple; I either was an alcoholic or I wasn't; no if's, and's, but's, real or unreal about it...............I WAS a real alcoholic....Now, I am recovered. See......? Simple.